Sunday, December 13, 2009

Tanner's white blood count was .64 on today's report so he definitely can't go out in public right now. Hopefully, these will be his lowest numbers and he will start to rise from here. I definitely don't think he will be released in the next couple of days - but I do think we will be home some time within this next week.

We go tomorrow at 8:30 a.m. for his labwork, the new cast at 10:00 a.m., and then to see Dr. Barlogie at 11:30 a.m. It took quite a while when they put the last cast on so I'm hoping we won't run late to the doctor's appointment (though we nearly always have to wait 1 - 2 hours when we go to the doctor's office).

I'm kind of dreading the cast appointment. The last time they put a cast on, they had to squeeze on his leg where the break is to keep the fracture aligned and it hurt him so much he was in tears. I just hate to see him go through that pain again - especially since they are putting on another long cast and it feels almost like he hasn't made any progress at all after six months of living in a full cast.

When he first broke his leg in June, we never dreamed he would have to go through all the treatment that has entailed since then. We sat in the emergency room that night and for all we knew it was a simple broken leg and then the doctor walked in and said those words that started our lives on a different course, "there's a tumor in his bone".

You go along living your life day after day, never considering that it could all change in an instant and then something like this comes along and smacks you in the face and you realize that your life is forever changed.

Tanner has had the best attitude through all of this. You couldn't ask for anyone to have a better attitude than he has since he was first diagnosed - but he's come to a point here six months later that you can tell he's getting tired.

If Dr. B tells him tomorrow he has to have another round of consolidation chemo, Tanner said he's going to ask him if he can have at least two months to just "recover" and live at home before he has to go through any more treatment. I just hope he handles it okay if Dr. Barlogie tells him he needs to go ahead with another chemo round without delay.

I tried to tell him he could look at it two ways, if the doctor says he can have a two month break then he will get a nice long rest, but if he tells him he needs to go ahead with the chemo as soon as possible, then he will be getting the last of the chemo behind him so that he can go on with his life. He didn't seem to think much of my reasoning.

1 comment:

  1. Tanner, I think of you every day all the time I am awake and I want you to know that if there were any way we could trade places I would do it in a heartbeat. Try to keep looking ahead to when all of this will be behind you. Even if you have to maintenance, that won't be as hard and time consuming as what you have been doing. None of us are guaranteed a life with no bumps in the road. At any moment any human being in this vast world of ours can be diagnosed with some disease. All of this that is happening to you is to serve a purpose. We don't know what it is and we don't know how it will all play out, but I can assure you that God has a plan and it affects not just you, but a whole host of people. You will probably never know how many people are out there reading your blog and how it has opened their eyes to their vulnerability. I know you make a big difference there at the hospital when you converse with the other patients. You have a great wit about you and have always been caring and cognitive of what is going on around you. You will have friends from all over the USA and the world due to this.
    We don't expect you to be anything other than who you are .... it is alright to get mad, to cry, to scream.
    We are all destined to go down a road of hardship at some time in our lives. We just never know when the journey will begin.
    We are so very proud of you in how you are handling all of this and how you have managed to keep your sense of humor. Keep smiling that wonderful smile of yours, keep faith in your heart and talk to God.
    We love you and send hugs and kisses to you,
    Granny and Pop