Tanner has been pretty sick to his stomach. For months there he could barely eat. He would take a couple of bites and that's all he could get down. He lost weight, when he really didn't have much room to lose weight to start with. He got circles under his eyes, his back was hurting and he was having muscle spasms, he became listless and had no energy. He wasn't happy... he was just surviving.
Dr. Berryman told him that it was good that he's maintained remission for so long - but that he needed some quality of life also. So, they stopped chemo treatments, and they stopped the Revlimid, and Tanner has been pretty much medicine free for around three months now... and he's feeling so much better.
Wednesday we went back to Dallas and his labwork all looks great. Dr. Berryman told him about a new "velcade" that has just been approved but that it's more for those with active cancer and is an IV treatment that is undergone twice a week. Tanner just waived any thoughts of having twice weekly chemo treatments again away and said "No thank you". Dr. B told him that he agreed that aggressive treatment isn't needed anymore, at this time, but that he "doesn't want to lose the ground that has been gained" and they have started him back on his Revlimid.
Tanner goes back in a month and they will see how he's done on 25 mg Revlimid. The doctor said if he has any issues, they could always adjust the dose.
So, at this point, Tanner just has to take his antibiotics, stomach medicines, and Revlimid and go to see Dr. Berryman once a month. He's very relieved that he doesn't have to go to the Oncologist office here in Fort Worth every week anymore.
They did refer him to a pain specialist in Fort Worth so he'll have to make an appointment there and see if this doctor might be able to assist him with some of the pain in his back and legs.
As for me, let's just say, I'm still here - and that I've found I'm not as strong as I thought.. hoped... I was... There are things I would like to change, need to change, about me, my life, and how I handle things... but I haven't been able to do a thing to change anything about my own life... I've struggled, to put it mildly. I have an appointment with a psychologist next week and I'm going to try and do what I need to do to follow through helping myself.
So, Tanner is in full remission and doesn't have to take chemo treatments anymore. He just has to take his maintentance medications (Revlimid, stomach medicine, pain medications, etc...) and follow up with the doctor once a month. He and Cearra are still very very much in love. He's going to be okay!
There are four questions of value in life... What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love... Johnny Depp